Releasing the Past to Welcome the Present

As you may have read from a recent post by Marta and me, we are in the midst of a grand and global leveling up in consciousness. Even those that don’t really tap into these energies have to feel it. There’s something in the air and it’s a new energy that’s causing us all to pause and take stock in where we came from these last few years and consider where we want to go for the next few. For me, it feels like the air is being pulled as it does into a vacuum. This wind picks up pieces of energy from all around me in a grand culmination of experiences and lessons that are delivering me to a precipice where I’m being asked to step into a new existence that is both scary (the unknown) and exhilarating (an uncharted journey).

These last 5 months have been such a surprise to me in so many ways I never saw coming. Where I thought there would be joy, freedom, and direction, I was shocked to discover there was actually pain, mourning, deep depression, and feeling more lost than I ever have in my life. However, what was most astonishing to me was the equal feelings of beauty, connection, and magick from a source I couldn’t see but know was there. It was a light telling me that the unbearable heaviness that shadowed me had a purpose and my gratefulness for that is infinite.

Then, out of nowhere, the darkness lifted. 

I don’t know about you, but my greatest and most appreciated teacher in all my life has been hindsight. The hindsight provided to me from this experience has been like a shedding of a layer of skin I didn’t even know I had. I had to feel all of the dark so that I could recognize the light.

I’m on the other side of that part of this journey now and though I’m smart enough to know that this doesn’t mean the journey is over, I do know that I’m being asked to step into a new space. I’m also wise enough to understand that I can’t take this step without releasing the past so that I can welcome the present. Notice I didn’t say the future. I’ll let each step into my present build the path to the future, as they should.

Spring has sprung and with it a new call to me to shed the weight of these last five months and I’ve decided to invite this release to be one of every part of me. I will release my mind with forgiveness, patience, and a renewed sense of self that will allow me to embrace parts of me I never felt I could inhabit. My mind will release self-sabotage, self-denial, and low self-worth to make room for power, confidence, and knowing. My heart will release grief, wounds, and pain to make room for love, community, and generosity. My body will release the walls it erected for protection, invisibility, and safety from judgment to make room for sovereignty, sensuality, and courage. All this while my soul lets it all die so the rebirth can begin.

I’ve decided along with all of this I’m going to do a 40-day detox and cleanse so that my physical self can meet my spiritual self in the same space. Yes, I said forty days…and though I know it’s going to hurt, I also know it’s going to hurt so damn good. 

This I know for sure: there are some things about me that I know make my life harder. However, in this case, my intense level of tenacity is not one of them.

Wish me luck, my friends. Or better yet, wish me love. ;-)